New Google Adverts: Branding for Ass-Kicking

November 30, 2009

As I was taking a casual stroll through Hulu, A rare but intriguing Google commercial popped up before watching last Sunday’s Family Guy episode. I took extra care seeing as Google doesn’t usually advertise, noticing the rare intricacies that make up the Google Personality. Here is a rough sketch of how Google plans to handle their rivals based off the search terms in this telling commercial:

coping with loss

Google is O.K. with the fact that Microsoft has taken a couple points off the old Marketshare. They realize that a little competition is good in this dog eat dog, innovative capitalistic society we live in. Like all things, Google must have known that another big player would try and “interrupt” the search market. As with their current bout of Facebook seperation anxiety , Google’s been quick to cope with some speedy acquisitions and the release of Google Social Search.

Reventing Yourself

If you’ve ever been to the Google Blog, you probably know that Google is one Sarcastic M$#@R F@#R, with some of their most recent articles being The new black (Friday) and Iraq Government On Youtube. Minimalist design, like that of Google’s recent toolbar testing, could be a way to shed that bad ass image.


Extreme Workouts

As mentioned before, Googles made some major product announcements in the last year or so, signifying they’re ready to compete with anyone that attempts to block their path of total destruction. With the latest announcement of a Google OS, A Google Phone and Google GPS, Google’s asserting it’s dominance with a friendly “Eat Me” sign attached to it’s virtual ass, something Microsoft is still gazing at.

Car Modifications

Google has recently made some under the hood adjustments to it’s search algorithm with the roll out of Google Caffeine to make it’s search faster, more accurate, and less snarky. Along with these barely street legal “Car Modifications,” Google was clearly thinking “innovation” by tinting the windows, pimpin out the stereo, and moving to a four door when it’s time to reconnect with Facebook again (all over the back windshield)


Stitching your own Wound

Google’s New Operation System, Chrome OS, is a clear F-You to Apple and Microsoft.

Flexible Kevlar


licensing Twitter’s data for Google’s Social Stream? Feel’s like Kevlar to me.

Gotham City Crime Statistics


Google is notorious for heavy R&D and Strategy. This harmless search query could be a sign that they are ready to clean up all the crime and rivalry in “Gotham.”

Clearly Google is pointing to some future ass-kicking with these snarky, passive aggressive adverts. Either that or Batman is heavily invested in Google.

Here is the original piece from their Youtube Channel

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One Response to “New Google Adverts: Branding for Ass-Kicking”

  1. Pure awesomeness.

    that video is genius. go google!

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